Why?

23 years, 4 months and 1 day ago God put sunshine in my life, in the form of my baby boy. We had some bad times but mostly good times. He truely was the apple of my eye! Then 2 months ago today, God took him home. Why did He have to take him? God, how I miss him. I miss hearing his voice every day, I miss seeing his smiling face, I miss smelling his cologne, I truely miss everything about him, good and bad! Some people don't understand why still the pain and sadness! I say to those people, you haven't lost a child. There is no love in this world like a Mom's love for her child. I pray every day for God to let me go to sleep and never wake up again just so I can be with my son and out of this pain. Maybe this is selfish of me, for it would leave another Mom in pain. It is just so difficult with seeing the black whole that surrounds me and barely holding my head up out of it, to not pray for it all to end. Spent the day with my grandsons last weekend. To hear Duce keep repeating over and over, "my daddy night night" is totally heartbreaking. Then to see Little Man get so upset that he keeps saying it, that he turns to him and says "Daddy is not sleeping, he is dead" makes it all so real, out of the mouths of babes! A 2 and a half year old that doesn't understand and a 5 and a half year old that understands too well! I really don't know where I am going with this, just having a somber day.

Skylar Zentner Young, I I love you with all my heart son, one day we will be together again.

Live life for today....